Three Steps to Get Unstuck in Midlife

Perhaps you’re entering a new season in your life and feel something is missing.

You recognize you want to try more new things. But you’re feeling stuck. You have a nagging feeling that your life could be better.

Maybe your children are beginning to leave the nest, your career is not as fulfilling as it once was, or you’re questioning some relationships.

Maybe you need a new job, hobby, business venture, or even a new relationship.

Getting unstuck in midlife can mean different things for different people. Maybe you are plagued with anxiety, stress, and rushing through life and you know this is not what it’s all about.

Deep down you know that your life can be richer and more fulfilling.

As Pema Chodron, Tibetan Buddhist nun, respected meditation teacher, and bestselling author explains in her book, ‘Taking the Leap: Freeing Ourselves from Old Habits and Fears‘ — certain habits of the mind tend to ‘hook’ us and get us stuck in states of anger and blame. It’s time to get unstuck when this becomes the overwhelming pattern in your life.

Feeling stuck, trapped, and possibly a little burnt out is something we all feel at times. Don’t let doubt, fear of failure or overwhelm hold you back from taking a chance!

Here are three simple steps for you to get unstuck. They require a bit of work but nothing you can’t handle! Let’s dive in!

Steps to Get Unstuck

01/ What’s Keeping You Stuck?

It’s time to slow down and listen to what’s keeping you feeling trapped.

You have to first figure out what’s keeping you stuck if you want to move forward.

This can make some of you uncomfortable and you may want to run back to your comfort zone. Remember, that’s not where the growth happens!

This is the perfect time to grab your favorite beverage, a journal, or a notebook, and start writing. Don’t get too hung up on what exactly to write. Personally, I love this colorful journal!

Some journaling prompts to get you started:

-What is making me feel stuck?

-What would I need to change to feel unstuck?

-Where and when am I happiest?

-Where am I unhappiest?

-What would it take to make a shift?

These questions may make you uneasy. It may be scary to realize what you need to change as you dive into your thoughts. You may be someone who stays stuck because you need to know everything. You admit you don’t want to be a beginner again!

Perhaps you are full of fear and doubt and honestly, afraid of failing. Don’t overthink it. Just stick with this step for a while and keep learning what you need.

No one else has to ever see what you journal about.

The answers may not come in a day. Give yourself a few days to get through this process.

This is a necessary first step every time you need to get unstuck, but it can be exciting to see what you discover!

02/ Make a Plan

It’s time to make a plan to become unstuck. If this feels daunting, I see you.

As someone who stayed busy for a long time, I knew I had to make some big changes and put a plan in place to leave my nursing career. After working with my own health coach, I knew I wanted to become a certified health coach. Without a doubt, I realized I wanted to help other women not make the mistakes I made going through menopause. But of course, I first had to make a plan.

Trust me — if you slow down and get honest through a journaling practice (even 10 minutes each morning for a week), the places where you’re feeling will show up. You’ll start to see a pattern.

Two things that I found really helpful (along with journalling) were listening to motivating podcasts or reading stories about how people I admired overcame adversity. It inspired me to create my plan to move ahead.

Of course, you can seek help from a coach or mentor if you need more guidance.

Don’t overwhelm yourself by making a big long-term plan. Start by listing small, simple steps you want to take. Check out my blog post ‘Journal as a Secret Weapon to Create Habits‘ for more tips.

03/ It’s Time to Take Action

You should be proud of yourself for slowing down to see where you’re stuck and then putting a plan in place to reach your goals.

Now it’s time to get moving and take action! Of course, fear and doubt might show up in your mind over and over. The way to shut them down is to start making steps towards your goals.

Of course, you may have to pivot and make changes once the plan is in place but that’s natural. Ask yourself, what’s the worst that can happen?

Inevitably, mistakes happen. These are opportunities and lessons you can learn from to steer you in a different direction. One that is more in alignment with the bigger plan.

Each step you take and succeed at will motivate you to keep going.

You got this!

Reach out to me if you would like more support in your quest to thrive and not just survive in midlife!