Self-Compassion Affirmations for Midlife
Midlife and the hustle and bustle of daily life can make it difficult to practice self-compassion. Many of you are probably pretty overwhelmed and busy with all of your responsibilities.
Using self-compassion affirmations — inspirational quotes or positive statements — is a wonderful way to embrace a more positive way of thinking. They quickly remind you that you deserve to be kind to yourself while creating a welcoming space as you gently step away from negative thinking.
When you slow down and finally listen to your inner chatter, you may find that you’re being very hard on yourself.
Perhaps you were taught that being self-critical is the only way you will reach your goals. You can’t remember signing up for this way of thinking but who you were raised by or spent a lot of time with may have influenced how you developed this trait.
First, stop here and congratulate yourself on becoming aware. This is the first step to creating positive change. It’s easy to say you need to change and maybe you’ve even found a method you want to use to reach your goals. But what if your mindset is keeping you stuck?
Being mindful and taking time for positive affirmations allows you to take time for yourself. Step back and see where you are struggling without judging how you got here.
Once you settle into embracing self-compassion affirmations, the good news is that it doesn’t take up more time than talking negatively to yourself! Read more about mindset during menopause in my blog post ‘Menopause Mindset.’
What Self-Compassion Means
According to Dr. Kristin Neff, an expert in self-compassion, having compassion for oneself is no different than having compassion for others.
Self-compassion means responding to yourself with kindness, warmth, and understanding — just like you would with a friend.
Being self-compassionate can start with asking yourself, “What do I need right now?” Do you need to speak up, be less judgmental and more accepting, or do you need to cope with some difficult emotions?
You should not expect to be perfect. As midlife arrives, many women recognize they need to make better adjustments to help them be healthier — physically and mentally.
We all share the reality of coming up against limitations, falling short of our goals, and having to pivot to get to where we want to go. Simply put, it’s important to love ourselves in the moment and truly feel deserving of good things. Be with ourselves in an accepting way to express self-compassion.
You can do this by becoming more aware, setting goals, and being understanding and kind when the inevitable setbacks arise. Positive affirmations can help you get there!
Different Types of Self-Compassion
Research shows that people who show themselves self-compassion have personal standards. You can motivate yourself to change and improve without undermining your self-confidence by using tender self-compassion or fierce self-compassion states Dr. Neff.
- Tender self-compassion, Dr. Neff explains is a version of a self-compassion break. You should go easy on yourself and practice tender self-compassion on days when you are not feeling well, struggling in some way, and simply need a break.
- Other times, fierce self-compassion is needed. For example, it’s time to act if you are in danger and have to get out of a situation. There is no time for self-acceptance in this scenario. Fierce self-compassion may involve protecting or motivating yourself.
It’s important to remember that being self-critical may help you achieve your goals but you will likely damage your self-worth along the way.
Be proud of yourself for practicing daily self-compassion affirmations as a step towards reaching your goals.
Tender self-compassion is needed sometimes.
Why Self-Compassion is Important
Being a self-compassionate person means not berating yourself when you fail. You can change unproductive behaviors and take on new challenges as you recognize your mistakes.
Dr. Neff has extensively researched self-compassion and describes the ways that self-compassion is closely linked to well-being and its impact on healing in psychotherapy.
As Byron Katie, an American speaker and author who teaches a method of self-inquiry known as “The Work” states, “It’s not your job to like me, it’s mine.” Her teaching involves challenging your negative thoughts to break free from suffering.
Starting with self-compassion affirmations is a great way to develop a practice of kindness with yourself.
Self-Compassion Affirmations
Choose a time when you are calm and focused to begin to practice self-compassion affirmations. Start by taking a deep breath through your nose. Slowly breathe out through your mouth.
Choose an affirmation that you need to focus on today. Write it down if you like. Place it near where you spend your day and say it to yourself or out loud with your hand on your heart. Truly pull it in and believe you deserve this affirmation.
- I deserve to ask for what I need
- I am worthy of feeling my best
- I deserve to take time for me
- I will create time to take care of what I need
- I can seek answers to improve how I feel
- I can work out in a way that I enjoy
- I am not defined by my mistakes
- I deserve acceptance and love
- I am worthy of attention
- I deserve to rest when I am tired
- I treat myself the way I want to be treated by others
- I embrace my uniqueness
- I choose to step away from drama
- I can make a real difference in the world
- I deserve to feel fulfilled
- I will seek out joy each day
- I will remember to see the good in everyone
- Finding gratitude each day is something I embrace
- I will only accept to be treated with respect
- I will walk away if I feel I am not appreciated
Other times, fierce self-compassion is necessary to help motivate change.
How Affirmations Work
Affirmations are a way for you to validate that you are important. They are easy to integrate into your life and help you during those crunch times.
Keep a list of your favorite affirmations on your phone’s note section or write them down on a sheet of paper to refer to when needed. Take out your listen when you are feeling stressed or anxious and your mind needs help calming down. We’ve all been there!
Improved health can be born out of practicing self-compassion affirmations regularly as you increase your motivation and embrace a more positive mindset. Research shows that thinking positively can rewire your brain, turning old negative beliefs and thinking into positive ones.
Reach out if you would like to know how I can support you in your quest to become healthier in midlife.
Kathleen is a registered nurse, certified life and health coach, and intuitive eating counselor who empowers midlife women to navigate hormone changes, manage menopause symptoms, and make peace with food for a balanced, healthier life. Her own journey of overcoming an eating disorder and navigating a difficult menopause inspired her to help women reclaim their health, break free from chronic dieting, and embrace intuitive, mindful living.
This is beautiful. I’ll repost on my Facebook site!
Thanks for the feedback Lorraine! A positive affirmation a day is a wonderful way to treat ourselves with compassion.